The Assman

Humans? You mean every living thing that ever existed?

Aggressive negotiations

Idiot. All I need is a Nokia with snake

All these weird numeric names. I’m gonna build a GPU and name it Jonathan.

You literally can. It’s a setting.

It’s better than bad, it’s good!

Only the good die young

Guarantee 99% of bluesky users have no idea what federation is

Neither can the future martian colonists

Put it in the ground

unintelligible polish chanting

That’s my homemade charcoal

I nicknamed mine Mike Johnson. I have erectile dysfunction.

My pixel 4 I bought used years ago is still fine

Mine is gardening. Cheap to start, gives you exercise, and ultimately pays you in food.

I’m not homolingual but I am spanish-curious

Shrimps is bugs

Member when you went to specific websites for specific content to amuse yourself, instead of trawling one of five garbage dumps to find something interesting to look at

Basically the first time an artist heard about demons they drew one with his dick out

The toaster oven I just invented works much better than a traditional one. It reheats French fries perfectly, you can dehydrate in it, makes succulent roasted chicken, and about 2.5% of the time it burns down your house. You’ll always need to keep an eye on it to make sure that doesn’t happen. Remember though, much better than a traditional one.