Sheesh, should’ve known better than to try and make a joke around here, I guess. I appreciated it, at least. I’ve got a soft spot for suddenly making really dire, grim statements in otherwise totally pedestrian conversations

It genuinely boggles that so many people would take “the evil night-horrors” as an actual argument for this

But the desk blocks me from accessing my penis???

I relate to the baby that was apparently too ugly to eat

Damn, people just straight-up don’t care about the content of an image if they see an opportunity to go on a tangent.

I wonder how ridiculous you have to make the text- paired with a pictograph of a problematic take like the original for this one- before people realize it’s not actually repeating the original sentiment or even saying anything at all

Hell yeah, rip 'em all day (when the setting is appropriate to do so)

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And, if my understanding of how everything that ends up following dystopian fiction only seems to get the dullest parts of it is true, it means we won’t even get a cool song to sing :\

Well, let 'em come over and we can all clip coupons together

I have learned to circumvent this issue by simply never being important enough to be invited to formal events.

It’s worked well thus far, though nobody seems to notice.

*In Corolla intensifies*

Fuck 'em, I do what I want.

Probably a bug I was saving for dinner? I don’t anticipate I’ll have a whole lot to bring with me at that point.

I used to mix it in with fried rice that’d been left sitting out for too long and turned really dry. Gives it some moisture and a vinegary edge, but probably not for everyone, since ketchup’s trademark is stomping all over the subtle flavors of a dish.

When I was in elementary school, I’d dip my pizza crusts in ketchup at lunchtime. I still do that every now and then with Sriracha ketchup

Also, same elementary school lunch: on pizza days, they also used to give us a side of tricolor fusilli straight-up. Just plain pasta without even so much as a little olive oil. So, fuck it. It got blasted with 'chup.

Absolver. It was the precursor to Sifu, but with slightly slower and more methodical combat (more like a Soulslike, almost).

The coolest part of it is, as you play and fight players and NPCs, your character will slowly learn and unlock the moves that are used against them, which you can then put into your moveset and chain together with other moves to create your own style. If you don’t want to do that, you can join a player-run school, and be given the fighting style of that school’s master, which your character will learn as they use it.

The story mode is pretty short. It’s mainly about PvP (although, before development stopped, it DID get a free DLC with a co-op dungeon run that’s worth killing a couple of hours on). Of course, a PvP-focused game with nobody playing it isn’t exactly the most entertaining thing to spend your time on, so- outside of a small collection of diehards- it pretty much stays a ghost town.

It had heart, it had ambition, and it had creativity. My friends and I were really hoping the success of Sifu would mean people might start going back and maybe breathing a little life into it, but that didn’t happen. We hoped maybe they’d announce a second one, but that hasn’t happened yet, either. It’ll probably just be another Sifu. That one was a proven success, so it makes more sense.

The servers are still up for now. No idea how much longer it’ll be supported. But, if you’ve got friends you can play it with, it might be worth looking into and seeing for yourself what the game offered, and what could’ve been.

Don’t forget the rather unfortunate usage of a bunch of people cruising around in the Confederate car all being named “Duke.”

See, there was once a man named David, who was the leader of a wacky little group of goofballs back in the '70s. That li’l jokester even went so far as to get everyone to call him a grand wizard, which is such a zany thing to ask people to do, but people totally did it with a straight face

Anyway, I wonder if it’s a coincidence. Who knows?

I figure it’s because the year can be seen as an optional appendage if you’re talking about dates from the current year. Like, I can say “that happened on May 5th,” or “I’ll be there June 18th,” and you can reasonably assume I mean in 2024 unless I specify “June 18th, 2063.”

Now, as for why you can say “I’m going on the 18th,” but Americans don’t say 18th of June, 2024, I haven’t a clue. We really only seem to have logical explanations for the way we do things about half of the time.

I’m biased towards Y2K from the nostalgia, since those were the prime years of my childhood right before my teenage years kicked in.

But, I love the design of that time because of how obsessed with futurism everything was. It took the future chic look of the mid-late '60s and revamped it, taking that hype for the future- with the Space Race- bringing it back, and updating it for the Information Age.

It felt like we, as a society, had so much optimism for the world that was to come. So, if anything, I think that’s what I’m mostly nostalgic for. I was so excited to grow up in that world. Damn.

I’d like to say it’ll be something pithy like “Thank God that’s finally done with,” but, more likely than not, it’ll probably be “Ah, shit, aaaaghhh, fuck, this sucks, God dammit, this hurts like hell, ughhhhh shit,” and then the sounds of me groaning my final breath and softly shitting my pants.

“You can do it, buddy. Shit your pants!”

I mean, I don’t actually know if people ever say this or not, but you can start if you wanna be a cool trendsetter!

I’m not sure what I think the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard is, but I know my mind usually goes to two songs:

Pastoral, by a man who went by the name of Moondog. He was a legendary blind composer, playing on the streets of New York City between the late '40s through to the early '70s.

He’s kind of a “your favorite musician’s favorite musician’s favorite musician” figure, and was known to play several instruments of his own invention (one of which I believe is used in this song, but I’m not sure). This is a very minimal song, but beauty doesn’t always demand grandeur.

Second would be Slips Away by Peter Silberman, the lead singer of a band called The Antlers (who also have a bunch of really moving tracks in their discography).

This one is also very simple, and quite melancholy, but I think it says all that needs saying. If I have a funeral when I pass, I’d really like this to be played at it.